I wrote this for when Heather needed to get out of tight situations. Since this was a frequent occurance, what better way for a bard to calm the townsfolk than with a song?
Gently, Good Sirs!
If the Grabbing and shouting quit,
You’d see I’d never pick a Duke’s pocket!
I am a bard! I do not deign
to be a thief! I entertain!
I kindly ask you, quit your leering!
The king himself gave me this earring.
My lute? What do you need that for?
I’ve had it since I swam ashore!
Who’s this Elvis you keep on about?
Seems to me, he’s quite the lout.
So what if I have ears like his?
I have spells, too! Does that make me a wiz- ..
Ah.. NOW I’ve got your attention.
All it took was magic’s mention.
Now.. Please..
Kindly listen to my songs
Pay me as I go along
A rogue I’m not, as you can see
So with your gold please honor me
And if you hate the chords I pluck,
Remember that they bring good luck.
Good luck indeed! To all that hear
Best luck to those that offer beer!
For I am a bard!! I do no wrong.
My Name? Heather Feathersong
(also, Elvis is a friend’s ranger character. He’s quite annoying to Heather).